After my mother died, I went into an emotional tailspin regarding plans for her wake, a grim task made easier by a good friend of mine that owned a funeral home and ended up directing the services.
My main problem was the music for the wake; it had to be just right.
I wanted no liturgical dirges that meant absolutely nothing to my mother.
I felt so strongly about it that it actually surprised me as I began thinking about all the musical possibilities.
My mom was the one that gave me the gift, the fire, whatever you choose to call it and I felt an almost desperate need to return the favor.
Hell, music had, in essence, brought my wife to me—it just doesn’t get any better than that.
Most songs were picked for particular reasons: Danny Boy (Bill Evans solo piano version), because it was a song her father used to sing to her and she really loved it.
Several Scott Joplin rags (strange, I know) because she’d spent a number of years trying to learn the Maple Leaf Rag, a difficult piece that would eventually elude her aging fingers.
I learned the piece years ago but never played it for her…a sadly missed opportunity.
I still play it today and wonder if I’m not really just playing it for her.
There was one song in particular that touched me in a magical way.
Thinking about it now, it was an epiphany of sorts.
It was, for me, the perfect combination of words and music that ultimately told my mom and dad’s story.
I tried explaining my interpretation of it to several friends that I knew would honestly listen; some got it, some didn’t.
“I don’t know why” is a song by singer/songwriter Shawn Colvin.
In my mind, the song had two very distinct parts: the first being that of a woman realizing her mind/memory is in deep trouble and she wants badly to explain what she’s feeling, the second being that of a husband/caregiver that wants his wife to know he will always
be there for her.
Take note that only the ‘wife’ mentions music.
It’s a unique spin on the lyrics and mine alone…unless, of course, Colvin wrote it with that specific scenario in mind. I seriously doubt it.
If you see her, ask her for me, huh?
In any case, the song reaches to a depth inside me that I really didn’t know existed.
Wordpress doesn’t allow for the playing of music (at least not easily)
If you’d like to hear the tune, download it on Itunes or contact me directly.
My original intention was to have you play it and read along.
Oh, well…in a perfect world.
I don’t know why – Shawn Colvin
(Wife)
I don’t know why
The sky is so blue
And I don’t know why
I’m so in love with you
But if there were no music
Then I would not get through
I don’t know why
I know these things, but I do
(Husband/Caregiver)
I don’t know why
But somewhere dreams come true
And I don’t know where
But there will be a place for you
And every time you look that way
I would lay down my life for you
I don’t know why
I know these things, but I do
I don’t know why
But some are going to make you cry
And I don’t know how
But I will get you by, I will try
They’re not trying to cause you pain
They’re just afraid of loving you
I don’t know why
I know these things, but I do
(Wife)
I don’t know why
The trees grow so tall
And I don’t know why
I don’t know anything at all
But if there were no music
Then I would not get through
I don’t know why
I know these things, but I do
I don’t know why
I know these things, but I do
~m
ps. anyone that can guess where the location of the picture is. . . gets a shameless plug on my next post. (great incentive, huh?)
My sister may be able to figure it out.
Think of am Irish song Mom always used to sing . . .
Smoke & Mirrors 