Write. Right?

There are days when words to write are scarce, simply not there from my point of view.

But you’re writing right now, I hear you say, how can there be no words?

For the literary alchemy to be correct (for me) there has to be some sort of ‘connection’ in the very depth of my words, significant reasons for them to fundamentally exist.
Today’s writing feels like an exercise in ineffectuality when in essence it is all about personal perseverance…I think.

I’ve read enough writing books to know that words will never come if you’re not holding a writing instrument of some type and actually writing.
Sounds simplistic but writers have numerous ways of putting off the muse.
I’ve done it.
So have you (if you’re a writer).

This is my pen and these are my thoughts;

For the past two Christmases, I’ve received a personalized writing journal from my like-minded daughter, Jenna.
In temperament and mood, we are two peas in a pod. Kinda scary…
I can’t for the life of me put my finger on why her gift moved me so, it just did.
I got choked up this year as I did last year and I’m sure my daughters all think I’m going psycho or something. (Dad’s freaking out again)

Oddly enough, I’ve yet to write in either journal.
Strange, huh? It’s like I’m saving them for a rainy day or something.

Aren’t my words special enough and uniquely me?

Are they worthy of taking up residence on the many waiting blank pages?

I’ve decided to place my writing bravado on the shelf (where it belongs) and do what all good writers do: write.

Sounds simple, but God, it’s really not.
(Writers, you understand, don’t you?)

It’s contemplating the act itself that sometimes leaves me feeling inept.

In the words of Natalie Goldberg, it’s just my monkey mind. (my internal censor truly believes that nothing I write is good enough)

Maybe I began writing tonight because I just wanted to thank my three daughters for gifts that were anything but ordinary and showed me how much they love to make me happy; and God, how they always do.

One more important note—Happy Birthday, Sarah.

You have reached a milestone.
You are no longer a teenager. (yikes)
Good luck in the ER but be prepared for some bumpy emotional terrain.
You can handle it, I’m sure.
And thanks for the new shamrock ‘dreamhat’.
Lord only knows, your dear old Dad needs it. . .

~m

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14 thoughts on “Write. Right?

  1. Oh yes, I know this tune too well. Sometimes I feel empty, but then I wonder if it really is the opposite problem – maybe rather than being empty it’s being too full – of thoughts, feelings, sensations, emotions – they need time to distillate down to words? It could be. Maybe you are just saving those journals for special words – they will find their way onto the pages when they are ready to come out. Of that I am quite sure.

    Happy birthday to your Sarah too.

    Love,
    Annie

    Maybe it’s working a bit more on the patience thing.
    These days I’m as full with words as I am with food…yoiks!
    ~m

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  2. i would never insult you by saying i know how you feel because i’m not even on the same universe as you when it comes to writing, but i can feel FOR you…to not be able to find words when you are a writer must be difficult beyond measure..however, maybe annie has a point? perhaps there are too many and the difficulty is in sorting them out? i know you’re not looking for an answer, but i felt to say nothing would in some way add to the emptiness…then again, maybe i just can’t help myself?
    one a brighter note, happy birthday to sarah..i hope her day is/was wonderful 🙂
    love the hat by the way…it’s a beauty

    Always difficulty in sorting them out.
    But when you do, you can find something worthwhile…unique.
    The birthday girl was out eating with a bunch of friends so I’m assuming her day went well.
    Thanks, Moe.
    ~m

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  3. I left my B-Day wishes to Sarah a couple days ago on a post but once again Happy 20th Sarah..And also to CPO Happy Birthday in Heaven

    (looking skyward)
    Thanks, GM.
    ~m

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  4. I find just BEING me helps. It’s mostly when I feel I have to sit myself down and produce that the river stops flowing. The best things I have written have come from a moment in time captured while still steaming.
    Granted, I haven’t published any books yet. And granted, writing is work. Still, once I get myself into the rhythm of finding a moment to BE, then the writing somehow just follows….
    I’ve had 4 years worth of empty journals, it’s those 4 years that still provide tons of living to draw writing material from.

    Definitely a ‘writer’s’ comment. I love it.
    I never really ‘sit myself down to produce’ but I know that just the act of writing is something I must do in some way, shape or form on a daily basis. I feel it’s in the clearing away of cobwebs that makes way for things I really want to say.
    The more chances you give yourself to produce art, the more successful you’ll be. It’s upping the odds, I guess.
    Thanks, SP.
    ~m

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  5. “Today’s writing feels like an exercise in ineffectuality when in essence it is all about personal perseverance” – that’s me every time I try to write something! Finding the right words is so hard for me. But I love to read. And when I want to express myself, I want to do it perfectly.

    I think if you keep thinking about it, Michael, you’ll eventually come up with the correct use of those journals. 🙂

    Like I said it’s partly patience as well. That’s a toughy.
    Thanks for the thoughts, Lolly.
    Watch for the CD!
    ~m

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  6. Oh, I definitely understand. I’m having some trouble with getting the words out, putting the pen to paper as well. And, no matter how many journals I buy, I never seem to get the urge to write in any of them.

    Oh, I have the urge just not the right words…yet.
    Thanks for stopping by Thinker.
    ~m

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  7. Sometimes you just have to sit down and let the muse take you where she will. I think that mine is a skank at heart.

    My muse looks like Danny DeVito and he smokes many cigars.
    I find his ashes all over the place.
    Such a slob…
    ~m

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  8. Not considering myself a writer as such, I can only partly relate to this, however do understand that horrible feeling you get when you can’t seem to do something you really love doing. It’s yuck. Hope you find your words again soon mate…I really do, not for me, but for you.
    Happy Birthday Sarah!
    Kelly

    Oh, the words aren’t very far away. They could be creeping around the corner as I write this comment… 😉
    ~m

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  9. Writer Chick hit the nail on the head about sensory overload and how it affects writing, so anything I have to say will be a repeat. But I do have an idea for those journals: write about them and/or to them, including pictures of them as they grew up and pics of your favorite places. I think it will be intensely touching, especially if you give these to them on a special day, such as their wedding. Just a thought. 😉

    Deb-
    I may remove this comment simply because that’s such a beautiful idea that I want it to be kept secret.
    We’ll see what happens. Thanks so much for the thought.
    ~m

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  10. I know exactly how you feel. I sit and look at the blank page, and there are no words. And the ones that do bother to show up are trite and corny. And then, when I read it, it’s like emotional vomit on the page. Sorry if that’s gross. But it’s the best description I could come up with.

    I’m totally into vomit on the page.
    It’s how we all sometimes have to write.
    Thank God it’s just metaphor…actually, it’s simile. Oops.
    ~m

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  11. Sometimes i just write “i don’t know what to say” for three pages. i have quite a few journals with at least two pages of that written out. But often, after a page or so, the simple fluid movement of my pen on the paper will bring me to say something. Don’t forget to allow yourself to whine, to gloat, to mourn, to observe without judgment. The key to writing is just to do it, even if it comes down to sheer rote movement of your hand… but the inspiration will come if you at least show up and try.

    You must be from the ‘Julia Cameron’ school of writing. 😉
    Not a bad thing. I read the Artist’s Way and did “Morning Pages” for a very long time.
    Whenever I really get stuck, I go back to writing the pages. Always frees me up.
    And the key is to just do it. There’s no other way.
    Writer’s write. Period.
    ~m

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  12. Funny! Over the years I have received 3 beautiful journals, and though I write as often as I can, I just can’t write in them. They are too perfect, too beautiful to sully,,,? If I write in those journals that came from oh so special people, well, I want the words to be beautiful, to dance, to laugh with joy, till then I don’t dare write a word in them. I must keep the journals till I can write something fitting, something unique. silly, eh?
    But thats how I feel! I don’t dare whine in those journals, it would be blasphemy!

    I can relate 100%.
    ~m

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  13. I, too, received a journal for Christmas and I’ve written three short blurbs in it about nothing. I will do absolutely anything to keep from writing my novel. This comment I’m leaving is a prime example in itself. 🙂


    It’s amazing the things we do, huh?
    My memoir is currently in “freeze” mode.
    I’ve no doubt that will be changing any day now.
    Thanks for stopping by, krkb
    ~m

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