What is the secret to a successful relationship?
I think the blog posts were meant to be somewhat humorous but both parties touched on some very vital and significant points regarding a long term relationships and how to make them actually last.
I began thinking about the relationship I’ve had the good fortune of sharing with my wife since January of 1978.
For Pamela and me, it began at a place called Finian’s where I used to play piano on Friday nights when I was going to Berklee College of Music in Boston.
I got quite friendly with a guy named Billy that came to see me almost every Friday night. This one night, he came in with a group of people; I took a break, sat down and began talking to Billy. I no sooner sat down when I saw her.
She had curly blonde hair and the most beautiful face I’d ever seen.
It would be shortly after that I would discover her incredible green eyes.
She had a really nice fanny to boot.
She knew I was looking at her and she smiled at me; I was a dead man.
That first night we didn’t exchange a word but every Friday night after she would come in with the group and as if by magic, I would sing and play better than I ever had before.
I didn’t know it then but I was singing for her.
We were eventually introduced and made the pedestrian and inconsequential small talk that all strangers make.
But there was something in the eyes when we looked at each other.
I’m sure she doesn’t remember, but I do.
I looked forward to Friday nights in the way a child looks forward to Christmas.
I couldn’t wait to see her.
One night, I found myself alone.
No group, no Pamela.
I was extremely disappointed but sang and played my way through a set.
I sat at the bar and ordered a drink, staring at the bottles of booze lined on the shelves.
I happened to look towards the far end of the bar when I saw her walking in—alone.
My heart skipped two beats.
I pray you know the feeling.
That small moment in time is something I tend to keep deep inside of me.
I can reconstruct that memory in such vivid detail and I remember perfectly and understand deeply why she will always be an inherent part of my very soul.
What we have is something many people are never able to find and I doubt I could tell them how to find it. Keeping it is worth the tears and compromise, the sunny days and the predictable inimical storms.
What scares the hell out of me is a world without her.
Screw the bee stings and the anaphylactic shock, where the hell would I be without her?
That’s something I will never be willing to compromise.
Maybe the most important thing about building a lasting relationship is all about pure luck and finding the “right one”.
I still find it ironic that we first met at Finian’s Rainbow Room.
Maybe it was the luck of the Irish after all…