rap sucks the big one

Rap sucks.

There, I said it.

What happens when you put a self righteous, condescending gasbag that loves Rap in a room with a musician that has played music his entire life?

If you’re thinking, “this can’t end well,” you are absolutely right.
It can’t.

I made a key tactical error in publishing a comment written by a dogmatic guy named
Gene (please insert his link here).

He’s from New York (not that I should hold that against him) and I’m from Boston.
He probably loves the Yankees and I love the Red Sox.
God help me.

What in the hell am I thinking?

Gene’s knickers got tied in a knot simply because I hear things differently than he does and I decided to comment on it.
He says he doesn’t like Jazz, but he would never criticize it.
Does anyone want to know why?

Can I hear an Amen, my brother?!

Basically, there’s nothing to criticize.

His seething criticism would be unquestionably ludacris. (Yes, misspelling is intentional)
I would read a post such as this and dismiss it simply because it’s obvious to me that this simpleton just-doesn’t-get-it. He doesnt “get” Jazz.
Have you ever seen a “Jazz Sucks” t-shirt?
I rest my case.


My musical mind is complex enough, Gene, so please don’t ask me to stand and hold a bucket of bullshit because you think I don’t “understand” Rap or Hip-Hop.
There’s really not much to understand musically or lyrically.
I have the God-given talent to be able to listen to a song a few times and be able to sit down at a piano and play it note for note.
If you doubt me, ask my wife.

I listen to a Rap song and say, “You have got to be shitting me. This is insane.”
It’s bad and tasteless poetry set over an obnoxious drum machine pattern with an even shittier sounding sequenced synth bass.

Jaco Pasorius is rolling in his grave.

Who is Jaco?
If I have to tell you, you really don’t deserve to know.

And poetry?

Frost, Emerson, Pound, Yeats and Eliot; these are true poets.

True poets are not: Ludacris, Jay Z, P. Diddy, Kanye West, Notorious B.I.G., and most certainly not 50 Cent.

These people are anything but quintessential urban poets.

What they choose to write is total 100% unadulterated bullshit.



Will it change the world?

Absolutely not.

To them, it’s all about oppression and prejudice brought about by the ubiquitous white man.

Boo-fucking-hoo. (thanks, Len Pitts)

Please, just give it up; it’s that attitude that has kept us all in the dark ages since the days of frickin’ slavery.

But does any human deserve to be treated like that?

Absolutely not.

My original post had to do with quality, not race, you jackass.
I have several black friends that agree with me on the music issue, for God’s sakes; for some people, Rap just sucks. Period.

Should you read this Gene, I do hope you’re happy.
You ultimately got what you wanted.
My Irish is up as are your blog stats.
You’re welcome.

Maybe you’ll comment on this post and maybe you won’t.
But if you do, know that your comment will be spamified faster than you can say ‘bite me’.
We will never see eye to eye on this “Rap” issue, that’s for sure.
As Bruce Hornsby says, “that’s just the way it is, some things will never change…”

And right now, my Irish is perfectly good with that.
Come to think of it, Rap is not unlike a decent Shop-Vac, it sucks and blows…



A few inspired links from friends to stir the pot a bit:

Leonard Pitts

Sexual Healing for teens

thanks,WC and DP for the bling, bling…




12 thoughts on “IntensityPlus

  1. Why yes, yes I DID like your rant. In fact, I loved it! *doing a little Irish jig*

    Any word on the donkey’s ass?


    Nothing yet.
    I’ll keep you posted.
    I’m assuming you mean the package?



  2. I don’t hate rap, I don’t hate any kind of music. But, when people have to play the “discrimination”, “200 years of oppression” card, then I get pissed. That’s utter bullshit. You’re life is what you make it. If rap stars write because of all those things, why do I have to look at their distastefully decorated homes on Cribs???

    I’m with you all the way, Carn.



  3. With you on this one m.. you know that.
    Why is it that when we don’t agree with them it comes down to the race thing, and other times entitlement.
    Reminds me of Kenye West after “Katrina” last year when the blame game was running rampant.
    They’re preaching to the kids that feast on lyrics that promote violence and hate towards others and oppress women. Sad that the so called entertainment world of so called music has come to this thanks to people like MTV who airs nothing but this urban crap now, You don’t see any of this crap on VH1 and why all for ratings brother…. G

    Everybody has an angle.
    I’ll never forget the look on Mike Meyers face the night West went into his diatribe.



  4. One more comment how can a person like Kanye West write a song proclaiming “Jesus Walks”with me, I’m sure he does but not in the manner of your song lyrics.He would never approve of the way you talk or treat women or others…….. Amen

    I second that emotion.



  5. I find rap extremely annoying. There doesn’t seem to be any real talent to it, just talk/shouting a lot of garbage, and the background music (using the term loosely) sounds like a bunch of kindergarteners banging on pots and pans LOL

    Kindergarteners are much more fun to watch…



  6. Maybe old Gene is the guy who developed that site m…. pimpify my name you remember the site.
    And like debambam I confess I have listened to some of Marshall Matthers… but non of the ones that the expicative stuff in it..centerainly he is not a cuz of the beav… remember when Sinead O’Conner first showed up at the grammy’s and we thought how could it get to this… Well it has gone a lot further.
    Some of thesed dudes make snoop dogg look like a gospel singer. And not just the rappers and Hip-Hop
    artist I saw something on the news an interview with a band “Everclear” and a song released called
    “Hater” the video has a guy wearing a crown of thorns, yet they claim it has nothing to do with J.C. supposivly a song about a messy breakup


  7. Michael, I’m still laughing. Unfortunately for the demographic that is targeted by the majority of rap music, they will NEVER understand where you’re coming from, OR be able to justify a decent argument against your way of thinking. An intelligent discussion just doesn’t need the words ‘sux’, ‘racist’ or ‘so there.’ It just doesn’t really cut it does it? I guess to Gene I have to say – get over it, this is the blogosphere, where your going to come across thoughts and opinions that are different to yours, get used to it. Its what makes the world go round. But here at Smoke & Mirrors mate, your a little out of your depth, so go back to whatever you call a life and enjoy it. And let Michael enjoy his. Of course his has music in it, so i’m guessing he’ll be smiling a little more than you 🙂

    That is the nicest comment I’ve read in a long, long time.
    Thanks, Kel. I appreciate the support.



  8. for some people, Rap just sucks. Period!

    I say for MOST people, Rap totally sucks. Period!

    I can’t stand it! It isn’t even music! It is a bad case of guru60’s_idus!!! When they would get on stage, chant their poetry 2 the beat of drums!
    AUGH! I can’t stand that either!

    Thanks, Starbender.
    I like the way you think. 



  9. God Bless your talent for telling the “Truth and nothing but the Truth!!! Amen!
    Absolutely Awesome!!!

    Hey Gene…….I dare you to do a little research on Jaco Pastorius and a great saxophone player named Wayne Shorter! (Gene…Wayne is black!)
    And Gene…while you are at it….please look up:
    Herbie Hancock
    Miles Davis
    Mcoy Tyner
    Duke Ellington
    Dizzy Gillespie
    Ella Fitzgerald
    Bud Powell
    Cecil Taylor
    Charlie Parker…..

    Gene….one more thing,,,,,,before you have the balls to go sparring with someone about a subject, please educate yourself a little bit so you don’t look like a complete buffoon!


    You and I are exactly the same when it comes to our passion for music.
    I love you like a brother, dude.
    You’re the nads.
    Thanks so much for the comment.
    Calle54, forever…



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