Hopelessly Stumbling

Eyes of the church

“…However hopelessly we stumble, it’s by the grace of God that we endure.”

~Michael McDonald, from the song “East of Eden”.

 

This is purely a personal observation but the grace of God is something I’ve seriously questioned over the past decade.
With each and every passing hour, day and year I find myself looking back over my shoulder hoping to glean a shred of understanding in regards to the real meaning of my life; a vast wasteland sometimes, IMHO.

If you know me personally, you know that I’m a complex and mysterious individual.
I’m prone to many dark moods which I interpret as a type of defense mechanism acquired to cope, to endure, to ultimately survive.

My good friend Kelly, from Australia, recently mentioned humankind's concept of belief in a recent post regarding Greek Mythology.

She said, “As humans we need something to believe in…”

While I see that sentence as the honest truth I found it to be, for me, a part of the total equation. In order to believe there must first be faith—in whatever or whomever you need to believe in.
The alchemic equivalent of faith and belief equals grace, the main concept of this post. There are still days when I wonder what the hell I believe in.
I think they’re called Mondays.

I waited on a gentleman today that was buying several very nice pipes for his dad for Father’s Day. His dad is eighty years old and still loves to smoke a pipe.
In a way, I was envious. He was so lucky and didn't know it.

I thought immediately of my dad sitting in the rec room on the hill staring vacantly out the window.

I thought about how nice it would be to give him something special this Sunday.

In a perfect world, he would smile and maybe shake my hand, maybe say, “Thank you, Michael.”

As I said, in a perfect world…

The past decade has been one big ‘stumble’ for me and I attribute my survival to one simple word: grace.

Had it not been present in my life I may have joined a carnival by now, probably running Mister Mick’s House of Smoke and Mirrors.

Personally, I’d much rather be blogging.

 

funhouse

 

 

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5 thoughts on “Hopelessly Stumbling

  1. Kelly may be right. It seems humankinds lot to look to some higher power to right our wrongs and give our life meaning.

    Fuzz- 

    I think we all need someone to cry to.
    Maybe that's the bottom line…

    ~m 

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  2. Hey Michael, thanks for the plug. It's always nice to know that something you've said or written has inspired someone else to think about it a little further, find their own questions and answers and of course more questions after that!
    And i think your right, faith needs to come before the belief, maybe thats why I have trouble…I don't have the faith. I wish I did, but it's not something that can be conjured up out of nowhere, it's either in you or it's not, and lord knows i've looked and tried…..

    Kel-

    I would never think about trying to change someone's mind in terms of religion or faith
    but I will say that I hope you at least keep an open mind and heart.
    Sometimes good things "magically" happen when we least expect it.
    Thanks for the thoughtful comments…

    ~m 

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  3. I find faith is very hard to have. I have a hard time believing so many people can have such faith and truly understand what it means. Rather I think they are following so as not to be left out.

    I would prefer to peruse my own path rather than follow.

    Lass-

    I don't think that faith is hard to have but I do think in this day and age it's very hard to keep.
    All you have to do to introduce doubt is watch the nightly news.
    That usually gets the process going for me.
    Obviously, I don't watch the news very much…
    Thanks for your thoughts.

    ~m 

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  4. "Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of
    things
    not seen."
    Hebrews 11:1

    "So faith comes from hearing, and hearing by the word of God."
    Romans 10:17

    "And the apostles said to the Lord, "Increase our faith!"
    Luke 17:5

    There are moments in my life in which I find myself gasping for faith
    and
    grace. And then I read a verse like Luke 17:5 in which even the
    disciples
    asked Jesus to increase their faith! (And they were witnesses of His
    miracles!)
    It just reminds me of my complete dependence on Him. It reminds me that
    I'm
    merely just plain human. And it reminds me to constantly pray and ask
    Him:"Lord…increase my faith!"

    ~Eliud

    Amen, dude.
    As always, thanks for the visit.

    ~m 

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  5. It's understandable how it is harder to have faith in hard times than when life is easy (if life is EVER easy LOL)

    I have strong faith, but I can't explain whre the reserve comes from. Kalil Gibran said: “Faith is a knowledge within the heart, beyond the reach of proof.”

    When I am feeling low, I always find comfort in the words of those wiser than myself. here is an excellent link to some thoughts on faith.

    One of my favorites (which is not on that page) is: “Faith is like electricity. You can't see it, but you can see the light.”

    I hope you will always be able to see at least a glimmer.

    Me, too, Marti.
    Me, too…
    Thanks for the wonderful comments.

    ~m 

    Like

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